25 Lessons Learned By 25

25 Lessons Learned By 25

25 was filled with twists and turns, but even with that, I 100% feel the best I have in years and feel I am only getting younger as the years go by. Here are 25 life lessons I've learned by 25.

Lesson 1: It’s okay not to have the next 30 years of your life planned out. 

As young adults, we're expected to have our lives planned out until retirement, but that's not realistic. I'm here to remind you that it is okay not to know what you want to do for the rest of your life. Rarely do things go 100% as planned anyway. Life is unpredictable, so I advise you to plan your life in seasons if planning for the next couple of years feels overwhelming. Planning in seasons looks like dedicating yourself to specific goals you want to reach in specific time increments. For example, if you want to learn to slow down more, perhaps you'll start your day with meditation each morning for 2 months and journal at night before you go to bed. You don't have to think about journaling or meditating for the rest of your life just for that season, however long you choose for it to be.

Lesson 2: Meditation and prayer are powerful ways to start your day.

This year, I've been able to remain extra calm and not let things overwhelm me as much as in prior years because I start my days with prayer and meditation. You have to get right with yourself before entering the outside world and interacting with people. Meditation and prayer have allowed me to have a new perspective on life and to be more grateful and slow down to appreciate everything in my life: the good, the bad, and the in-between. This isn't to say I don't get mad at times, and I am always happy, but more so, it's allowed me to control my emotions. Allowing my mind to be quiet has taught me more life lessons.

Lesson 3: Mindset is everything.

You can not achieve anything without having the right mindset. I went through years of not seeing much progress in the goals I set for myself, and it was because my mindset wasn't right. I kept getting stuck and allowing limiting beliefs to take over my thought process. Watch motivational videos, surround yourself with people you aspire to be like, and do the work to fix your mindset. It will change the trajectory of your life.

Lesson 4: Be Intentional with your intake.

Be intentional about the foods you put into your body, the words that come out of your mouth, the music you listen to, your body movements, etc. A life lesson to note here is that everything we do, say, and eat cultivates our reality. If you eat shitty food long enough, you'll start to feel shitty. If you listen to music talking about toxic relationships, you'll probably start to realize the men you're dating/in a relationship with are shitty and not adding any value to your life. Analyze your intake if things in your life feel like they are going in a downward spiral. 

Lesson 5: Take imperfect action

We can die at any moment. Our lives can change in unexpected ways at any moment, so bring to life the ideas you have in your head. Don’t wait. One regret I have is not starting sooner with consistent content creation. I've always had the ideas and the wisdom to get started, but I waited and waited until I was sick and tired. Don't wait for the perfect moment to start; it'll never come. What you want to manifest into your reality won't come true unless you take action.

Lesson 6: Share your story; you never know who’s watching. 

I got a part-time job because of the content I put on LinkedIn through an old coworker I never directly worked with. The CMO of a billion-dollar finance company had positive reviews of my blog posts, and I later received an offer to work for the company. I got booked for one of my first paid speaking engagements by someone who came across a LinkedIn post of mine. You never know who is watching, so share your story and your life lessons. Share your value with the world. You don't know what opportunities can come from this.

Lesson 7: Understanding and perspective is important.

Humans are natural complainers. Being around other people and hearing their complaints made me realize it's important to gain perspective and understand why certain things happen. For example, let's say your Uber driver is running late. You can get upset at this. You have places to be and things to do. However, we don't know if that Uber driver is running late because there was an accident on the highway, and someone ended up in the hospital. We don't know if they're running late because they're looking for child care or are dealing with a family emergency in the middle of work. Before you get upset and start acting irrationally, gain an understanding and shift your perspective.

Lesson 8: Work on yourself; you are your greatest investment.

Nobody can take away your skills or your story from you. Invest in your own personal development to attract more great opportunities. Stay ready so you don't have to get ready. These investments can look like getting a trainer if you want to get fit or getting great skincare products to ensure you look like your best self. Investing in books, courses, and coaches so you can continue learning and growing. This is a lesson for life: If you are not investing in yourself, how do you expect others to invest in you? Invest their time in getting to know you, listening to you, or allowing you to join their company.

Lesson 9: Having a daily gratitude practice is transformative.

Waking up, expressing gratitude, and writing down the things I am grateful for have allowed me to attract much more abundance in my life. When you express gratitude for what you currently have, the universe gives you even more to be grateful for. Gratitude has also changed my perspective and the way I view things. I remember being in the Dominican Republic, so grateful that lights don't go out and water doesn't run out where I live in NYC. Switching up your environment can allow you to see different things for which you can be grateful.

Lesson 10: Be positively delusional about your goals.

You have to have unshakeable faith in yourself to accomplish your goals, or in other words, be positively delusional. Being delusional has allowed me to manifest tickets to a conference I have wanted to attend for years; it's allowed me to be financially stable even in the midst of having large expenses because I don't believe in having a lack mindset. It's allowed me to land different roles and speaking engagements. Being delusional is free 99, and it will get you places. Life lesson: even when nobody else believes, believe in yourself.

Lesson 11: Don't let other people's limited perceptions affect you and your goals.

People will always try to throw worry in your face when you talk about goals; simply put, they project their scarcity mindset and their own limiting beliefs. Just because things haven't worked out for them, this doesn't mean things can't work out for you. Don't let other people put doubt or fear in your heart. You have the ideas in your head that are meant specifically for you to execute. They don't have your lens to see through; they have their own. Your vision is prescribed to you specifically. 

Lesson 12: Take care of your body future you will thank you.

Being a person of color, I know in our communities, many preventable diseases are running rampant. People wait until it's too late to take care of their bodies. You still have the option and time to care for yours; don't wait until it's too late. I was pre-diabetic in 2019, and I'm happy to share that I've moved away from that diagnosis. This was possible because I started intentionally moving my body and eating foods that were better for me. Experiences continue to be repeated if you don't learn the life lesson attached to them, so I decided to do better for myself.

Lesson 13: It's okay to spend time alone.

It is okay to not be in a relationship. It is okay to not be in the dating scene. You don't always have to be in a relationship. Walking away from a relationship that is not serving you is okay. I honestly wished more people loved themselves more to spend time alone and analyze their wants and needs in a relationship before jumping into one and staying because the person is giving them mediocre love, and this feels like enough to them because they don't love themselves enough. I've been alone for several years now, and it's been one of the most peaceful experiences ever. Things will stay this way until the right person comes into my life. Choose peace, not problems. Choose to be alone over bad companionship. Life lesson: it's better to be alone than to be in a relationship that's weighing you down.

Lesson 14: Make new friends outside of the friends you made in school.

Don't feel like the only friends you can have are the ones you made in school. Go out to events that interest you, even alone if no one wants to join you, and make new friends. As you get older, you'll start to outgrow people, and it's important you still have community around you. It's important to have people who are aligned with the new adult you, not who you were 5-10 years ago. 

Lesson 15: You will outgrow people.

It is okay to let go of friendships that are no longer serving a purpose in your life. Sometimes, people can grow in different directions, which is okay. Don't feel like you must stay in a friendship because you have been friends for 15 years. If this relationship no longer adds value to your life, it's time to cut it. It's time to make space for new blessings. You can wish old friends well and let them go. Forced relationships serve no positive purpose in your life. Allow yourself to mourn the friendship and feel your feelings, but understand that this is the best decision you both could've made to continue promoting each others' growth.

Lesson 16: You must put yourself out there to get what you want.

Nobody is a mind reader and will get you what you want if you don't put yourself out there and explicitly tell people what you want. Stop blocking your own blessings. Share that gift you have within you that comes almost naturally to you. The world wants to see more of that. Life lesson: closed mouths don't get fed.

Lesson 17: Write your goals down.

Write them down and put them in a place where you can see them frequently. The more you see them and feel the emotions behind this specific goal, the faster you can manifest it into your reality. Seeing it will allow you to take action toward it and, in turn, bring it to life.

Lesson 18: Self-accountability is a life skill.

Accountability will get you far not only within your career but in your personal life as well. Holding myself accountable has allowed me to push past any comfort zone I may have been living in and enter a continuous, purposeful growth state. Also, sometimes you are the issue, so take accountability for your actions. Nobody is perfect. Once you accept that truth, things will be better for you. In my career, I've been accountable to myself, and my managers have seen this and celebrated it, which has allowed us to work with more fluidity. 

Lesson 19: Shoot your shot.

For me, shooting my shot is going after what I truly want and betting on myself, even if I don't know the outcome. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take, so why not shoot? Most people die regretting the things they didn't do, not the things they did do. If you need a reminder of why you should shoot your shot, here's one- I applied to be a speaker for CultureCon 2023, knowing the people that were on stage were folks like Tabitha Brown and Tracee Ellis Ross in prior years. I still applied, being my positively delusional self, and I got a free ticket for a guest and me because I wasn't accepted as a speaker. I probably wouldn't have been at the conference if I had not done this.

Lesson 20: Confidence is powerful.

You become a magnet when you are confident in yourself and your abilities. People start to reach out to you more when you are confident. As people, we gravitate and listen to folks who are confident and speak with a level of authority. The more confident I've become, the more I've attracted the right opportunities to me. Lacking confidence made me miss out on jobs, speaking opportunities, dressing up, and so much more. Nobody wants to be around a Debbie Downer who's always talking down on themselves. It's exhausting, and I can say this confidently, having been the friend who always spoke down about myself in the past. Now that I am more confident in myself, I'm leaving all of that in the past, as I've seen where confidence can get me.

Lesson 21: You are more than a job.

Develop an identity outside of your job because, in an instant, it can be taken away from you. I was fired in March 2022 and later laid off from a different company in September 2023, and I've been able to still do well for myself. Why? Because I developed an identity outside of work, and I have my own projects and things that fill my cup outside of work. I feel great not having a full-time job because there are still things that I am doing that I love and enjoy. Don't lose yourself to a job. Don't let your job become your identity. 

Lesson 22: Get good with your finances ASAP.

It feels like we've been living in unprecedented times for the past 100 years. We don't know what is to come, but we do know that the cost of living is growing every day, inflation is getting higher, and if we plan on not only surviving but thriving, we have to get our finances under control. Having immigrant parents and seeing how they've had to save as much as possible, and the wealth hasn't increased a lot over the years, has made me realize that I will be the one to change the trajectory for my family. I've been afforded the skills and resources to be able to build wealth, and I will do that. You don't want to find yourself dealing with a family emergency and being unable to pay or falling into deeper debt. Contrary to popular belief, money can bring happiness, and wealth can change people's lives. We all deserve to travel and pay for what we want without being scared to open up our banking app afterward. If you aren't good at saving and investing now, you will suffer in the future.

Lesson 23: Everything in life is a choice.

This may be a hard pill to swallow, but if you're in a shitty predicament now, recognize that part of that has been the choices that you have made leading you to this position you are currently in. However, you can change things around for the better, so start taking active steps toward building the life you want. Start being intentional with your time, choices, and actions.

Lesson 24: Not every career move is going to make sense.

Sometimes, things won’t happen as quickly as you want them to, but they’ll happen on God’s timing. For the longest time, I couldn't figure out why I was in sales, and it wasn't until after I got out that I recognized how valuable a life skill sales is. You'll always have to sell something to someone, whether it's selling yourself to a company to get a job, selling a vacation destination to your friends, or anything else sales is important. With that being said, every career move may not make sense, but it will once you reflect. Everything is a stepping stone, getting you to your destiny. 

Lesson 25: Figure out the why behind your life decisions.

Figuring out the why behind why you do what you do will allow you to be more intentional and take consistent action toward your goals. It wasn't until I figured out my why when it came to my weight loss journey that things made more sense, and I became more consistent with my nutrition and exercise regimen. Figure out your why, something emotional enough that drives you to take action on the days you don't feel like showing up. Get deep, and it'll allow you to progress further and faster.

If you made it to the end, thank you for reading all of these life lessons. After reading these lessons, I hope you gained wisdom and knowledge and feel powerful.